I want the deepest, darkest, sickest parts of you that you are afraid to share with anyone because I love you that much. And now I'm showing you mine. I'm but an average, untalented girl living in suburbia attempting self-discovery. I am ordinary. I live an easy life and yet I'm still unhappy; I'm hoping keeping track of my thoughts will make this easier to understand. I care little for other people's emotions. I lie to others to make my own life easier, but not ever to ease their suffering. I will not lie to you. My thoughts are my own, not easy words fed to me by my parents or my government. I am part of no church, and I believe in no god. The only thing I need to be saved from is my own mental unrest. I ate his heart then I swallowed his brain. If you don't love me back, I'll do it again.
The way I go about forgiving people is reminding myself that even the shittiest people have felt pain and wanted love and thus deserve my respect. That allows me to still see them as human and also that their flaws are probably also as human as my flaws--born of ignorance, indulgence or social control. Humans can get better even if it won't be me that makes them better. And thus more importantly to forgive myself when i must not actively hate but at least avoid people i can't forgive.