I just want to chop my tits off.

I want to be able to wear cute clothes, and actually have stuff fit correctly, and be able to wear low cut tops without looking like I’m trying to be sexy, and I want my tits to not be the only thing people notice about me because they’re so obnoxious, and I want to be able to go braless.

Nothing fits me correctly, anything low-cut makes me look like a porn star, I’m constantly judged because people assume I’m trying to show off and look sexy, I have to wear a bra even to bed because if I take one off for even a minute it’s not only physically painful but hideously fucking ugly and unflattering because my boobs are neither perky nor perfectly shaped. I just fucking hate these things. They get in the way and cause me problems. They’re too big for my frame, entirely too big. They make me look 20 pounds heavier than I actually am. Honest to fucking god I’m going to save up enough money to get them surgically reduced so I can be rid of them.

Moral of the story: don’t complain about having small tits. Tiny boobs are fucking adorabe.